Guest columnist of Charles M. Guthrie
November 22, 1964
GRANDPA GUTHRIE sent me one dollar and said why didn't I try writing a colum for him and if what I wrote was worth puting in the paper I could keep the one dollar.
I asked what I should write about and he said he did not care as long as it was something I knew about and it would be rediculus for a 10-year-old kid to write about Vet Nam or Goldwater.
He said Thanksgiving is coming up and you might try something about that. My cosin Mark Shoberg did that last year and Gramps thought it might be good for all his grandsons to have a go at Thanksgiving and make it a tradishon. But there are eight of us and that would be six more years to go and the old gent might not be writing a colum that long on account of being dead and besides there is no law against the stork bringing more kids.
I THOUGHT A BETTER idea would be to write about our two Scotties but Gramps said he had wrote a piece about dogs earlyer in the month and the readers could not stand another one so hear goes about Thanksgiving.
Sometimes we go to Butch and Edna's which are my other grandparents in Jeffers but usually we spend Thanksgiving on Grandma and Grandpa Guthrie and probly will do it again this year if Dad can get off work. He is a dog and cat doctor and dum animals are just as lible to get sick or hit by a car on a holiday as any other time, Dad says. But it is to late to cry about that now. He should of thought about that before he went into vetnery.
There are six in our family counting Mom and Dad. And Dad's sister and her husband have four boys to and they are driving to the old folks for Thanksgiving to. That makes 12 of us and Uncle Tom and Grandma and Gramps make it 15 so I am not worried about eating out. This would cost the old fellow 40 bucks or more and there is nothing he likes better than money.
MAYBE HE THINKS he could feed the grown ups for about 21 dollars and us eight little kids could get one half portions and maybe eat for a buck and a quarter each. Well, if he thinks we will hold still for that he has another think coming because I and Todd and Mike can put it away about as good as Dad. And my cosins Mark, Cary and Paul eat good to. The only ones who would not cry about one half portions are my brother Scott and cosin Bobby who are to little to know it when they get gipped.
We go kind of pot luck on Thanksgiving. Grandma gets the worst of it with the turkey and dressing and potatoes and stuff but my Mom brings salad and pickles and stuff and my aunt brings minse and punkin pies. She could leave out the minse for all I care but it is Gramps favorite and he is her father and she likes to humer him.
It is fun to go there because Grandma never throws nothing away. There are old cars and trucks in the garage and toys in the basement and atic and if Gramps had his way they would all be throwed out as he says it is just something to stumble over but Grandma says as long as us kids like to play with it she will hang on to it because that is what grandmas are for.
My Dad says to pay no attention to Gramps as he does a lot of blowing which does not add up to nothing but wind and Dad ought to know what he is talking about as he was Gramps little kid once.
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| Mad magazine #39 May 1958 |
Copyright 2014 StarTribune. Republished here with the permission of the StarTribune. No further republication or redistribution is permitted without the express approval of the StarTribune.
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